Some people stand out.
Jeff is someone who stands out where ever he goes. He’s open and affectionate in a touchyfeely kinda way and loves to carry around and share his matchbox truck. He usually has a minder with him so when I saw him having fun with the guy next to him on the bus, I thought the guy must be his new minder (I hadn’t seen Jeff for a few months). Jeff was holding his hand and they were playing with his truck. It was endearing to see they really enjoyed being with each other. I was then surprised to see Jeff get off the bus by himself. The guy wasn’t his minder at all but another passenger who generously accepted and genuinely enjoyed Jeff’s ‘way’. I watched out the window to see Jeff meet with his minder (the one I have seen him with numerous times before) and the minder was clearly not happy with him. He scolded him in the middle of the street and stormed away. Jeff stood like a cowered puppy, looking up at him, nodding seriously then when he stormed away, Jeff ran/skipped after him. I couldn’t help but feel upset by what I had seen. Happy carefree Jeff with the stranger then humble cowered Jeff with his minder. I was teary and disconcerted for the rest of the morning. Only a few days later, I was standing at another bus stop and Jeff came along with his truck. He bee lined for me. He held my hand, felt the muscles in my arm and showed me his truck. A miraculous thing happened then – I was able to talk to him, participate with him, and return his affection easily. Why should that be a miracle? Because my natural tendency is to recoil from overt attention, especially affectionate attention from a stranger. I was only able to respond so graciously because I had been shown how to by the beautiful generous passenger days earlier…
1 Comment
Jeannette
13/8/2017 03:56:16 pm
I have read many testimonies, and have my own, of how people with Downs Syndrome unintentionally teach others about unguarded expression of affection. It has caused me to ponder on why and how a particular gene (or lack of it) determines our perception and expression of love and acceptance from others, thus making us more or less guarded and uncomfortable when near unbounded joy.
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